Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Jan 23, 2019 11:33:47 GMT
And non-heterosexual or non-cisgendered people seem to be somewhat overrepresented amongst our ranks. Before saying anything more, I need to declare that I am very heterosexual and well towards the hetero end of the homo/hetero spectrum. This doesn't mean that I am homophobic, I know and interact with a fair number of people who are gay (most of them openly so). Just like others in society who fail to understand my leg brace fascination so I fail to understand same-sex attraction. I am happy to accept and live alongside any 'specialised' lifestyle as long as it is not rammed down my throat (possibly unfortunate choice of words!). So, I do find such things as Gay Pride marches, the National Trust's insistence on over-emphasising gay culture, and aggressive vegans - to name but only a few examples - pretty tiresome. It is the 'evangelistic wing' of all these things where people practising them seem to be unable to accept other more normal people's lifestyles - even if the other people are in the vast majority - that I find unacceptable. Having said that, I had not noticed any over-representation of non-heterosexual etc on this forum. That doesn't meant there is not, just that I personally had not noticed it. There might be a reason for this: My personal experience is that gay people in general (or at least those that I come across) tend to be extrovert and have a tendency for exhibitionism. One only has to look at the preforming arts to see this and I have experienced it first hand with gay acquaintances. I suspect therefore that gay people on the forum will tend naturally to declare their leanings either in their public profile or within posts. I guess also, that having to live with a proclivity that until relatively recently was not acceptable in mainstream society (illegal in Oscar Wilde's and Alan Turing's times), gives the gay community the courage to explore in a more public way any 'unusual' inner feelings they may experience. There. Probably another can of worms opened.
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Post by jaylad on Jan 23, 2019 17:01:26 GMT
My first reaction to this post, apart from getting annoyed, was what exactly does this have to do with a forum dedicated to medical braces? Perhaps ikb5 only goes on a rant when he is wearing his KAFO!
It is undoubtedly the case that attitudes such as this are one of the main reasons that anyone in our society who is perceived as different, either due to disability, sexual orientation, ethnic origins and lots of other things continue to face discrimination.
We are all (or at least we should be) on this forum because we have a shared connection with medical braces. Does it matter what our gender, sexual orientation, ethnic origins or dietary preferences are, because it really really should not. The forum should be all about helping each other in our desire to either use medical braces or appreciate those who do. It should not be about promoting our own biased or stereotypical views.
And just to stay true to the 'what do you do whilst in your braces' I am writing this with my computer on my lap, sitting in my wheelchair with my feet and calves supported by my carbon fibre AFOs.
Now I just need to go and find a wheelchair friendly Gay Pride March so I can take my boyfriend and enjoy eating our Vegan packed lunch when we get there!
Not so much a can of worms, more like a den of vipers!
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biene
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Post by biene on Jan 23, 2019 17:18:03 GMT
Well, I may have been overhasty with that characterization -- there's no good way to estimate the percentage of GLBTQ+ people who like braces in comparison with the general population (I mean, there are hardly going to be any reliable statistics about us to begin with...). My own impressions are probably influenced to some degree by, for example, the prominence of "Dr Hinkel's Orthotorium" back in the early years of the internet and discovering the existence of other people who share my obsession. And I can easily think of numerous people in various brace communities who diverge to one degree or another from "mainstream" gender norms and lifestyles (as with so many things, this is not an absolute, but a spectrum, and there are multiple types of masculinity and feminity, some of which may be interpreted as "queer" in certain circles). It's also possible that sexuality is something that is simply more likely to come up in a forum like this -- for many people the interest in braces does have a sexual component after all -- than, say, at the workplace or social groups like football/choir/book club or whatever, so there could easily be many more GLBTQ+ people in my social circles and I just happen to not be aware of them.
Edit: I brought this up because I'm interested in intersectionality and how it contributes to identity, i.e., whether people who are interested in braces are also more likely to feel like "outsiders" in other ways (certainly it applies to me and my attempts to understand where this particular interest comes from and what it means). I see that this topic was probably rather ill-considered, and I agree that it is rather far from the original question of "what do you do in braces". I would be happy to let the discussion return to being on track.
(Woah, long sentences, sorry. The German love of labyrinthine constructions occasionally rubs off.)
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Jan 24, 2019 8:23:37 GMT
My post merely tried to draw parallels between our 'lifestyle' choice to wear braces and other non-mainstream lifestyle choices such as practiced by people who, for instance, fall under the under the GLBTQ+ label (and there many other labels attached to various lifestyle choices).
The only 'attitude' I think I revealed was my dislike of the practise of unnecessarily evangelising lifestyle choices. That, I'm afraid is an attitude which has formed over 5+ decades of first hand experience and I'm unlikely to change that attitude now.
If my post falls outside the rules of this forum then I trust the moderator will delete it
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Post by castmenow on Jan 24, 2019 9:53:04 GMT
If my post falls outside the rules of this forum then I trust the moderator will delete it I do not believe that we are moderated, Harry the admin appears to have set this board up and as it was slow early on left it alone, it is over 18 months since his last log on according to the members list, so it is up to us to keep things civil, although I suppose one could press the report button and that may email him.
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Post by castmenow on Jan 24, 2019 10:13:31 GMT
Interesting, I had assumed that the social anxiety was my own idiosyncracy and not something I expected that other brace wearers here would share. I have however long suspected that many, if not most, of us are "wired" a bit differently than the general population in one way or another. Mental health struggles in general are a recurring theme, I've noticed that we have a tendency to focus intensely on things that interest us, and often have hobbies (besides braces) that involve acquisition of detailed, specific knowledge and skills. I've found that the intensity of my need to wear braces has lessened over time, mostly due to 1) accepting that it is not something that will ever completely go away, rather than trying to deny its existence, and 2) having the opportunity to wear my braces when the urge is there. biene, Well, thanks for putting in some well thought out posts, you have certainly continued to pique my interest with the one above. I have taken the liberty of leaving just a few of your points in the quote above, because they certainly apply to me. I have always been a little socially inept and anxious about meeting new people. Once I get to know someone that is fine, but the initial stage of first contact has always been difficult for me and something I would always try to avoid if possible. This always used to be a bit of an issue professionally (before retirement) because at times I had to attend conferences, trade shows, visit customers with the sales staff or suppliers with purchasing. Mostly I worked with colleagues I knew in the engineering department of my company and when asked to go to things with new people I would actively avoid it if possible. I was happy to present papers and give talks at conference, they are impersonal, 400 people sat watching me was not an issue, but then after ward, having to go out to meals or have small meetings with customers was something I dreaded. I said in the "Wondering why" post that I had read material that concluded those of us with strong fetishes were somewhat differently wired for want of a better word. Mental health is certainly a factor, however, what I saw was if I was feeling depressed or otherwise anxious (work problems, home problems) then my desire to wear braces grew stronger, almost as if it was a coping or comfort / security thing. Yes, I have hobbies which involve having specific knowledge, acquisition of skills and equipment and most importantly can be carried out mostly on my own, certainly not as a team activity. Finally, the depth of my feeling is reducing with age, both due to the points you make, I have accepted it and I can now wear them when I wish because I have some, but also, my wife has accepted it and let me have the braces, so in a way, the activity is no longer "underground" and hence it no longer has the thrill of doing something that is verboten. The final thing is that as I have now retired and my children have left home, I have very little in my life driving me to distraction, i.e. I have few causes for feeling anxious in life or getting me depressed and then looking for my security blanket.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Jan 24, 2019 14:03:20 GMT
Castmenow,
Apologies for the thread drift. I guess I got a bit carried away with contributing to a welcome increase in activity on this forum.
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Post by nkotbmof on Feb 27, 2019 10:03:47 GMT
New Kids on the Block is my favourite pop-band of 90s. NKOTB had so many hits! The ones I remember are 'Tonight', 'Baby, I Believe In You' and, of course their hit 'Step By Step'. These are real songs, not fake like today! And it is awesome they have a tour in 2019! So I'm going to attend New Kids on the Block concert this year. The concert dates is here: New Kids on the Block tour Nashville. Check it out and maybe we can even visit one of the performances together!
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Post by BBoysmof on Mar 4, 2019 12:31:51 GMT
Backstreet Boys BSB are an American boy band. The band was founded on April 20, 1993 in Orlando, Florida, by Lou Pearlman. Now this is the most successful band with more than 100 million records sold all around the world. The band was named after a flea market in Orlando, the "backstreet flea market". In 2019 BB has more than 50 concerts in the US with their DNA US tour. Check all concerts at Backstreet Boys tour Nashville site. Full list of tour dates & concerts!
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Post by deejay on Mar 4, 2019 22:30:34 GMT
Seems like spam messages are getting onto site. (Each based in Nashville it seems)
Wonder what can be done to stop them. Would it not be better that the whole site was 'sign in' to post?
Apart from that....its a bit quiet at the moment!
Any news from anyone?
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rk52
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Post by rk52 on Mar 4, 2019 22:41:57 GMT
I have reported the spam posts but have not had a response, it seems the site no longer has an admin. So there’s not a lot we can do. I agree that it would be better if more of the site was “members only”.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Mar 5, 2019 16:48:08 GMT
Would it be worth contacting VB on their website email and asking if they would pass on our concerns? As the forum must surely generate sales for their recreational business, I would have thought they would at least pass the message on.
I would prefer that only one area was open to non-members as opposed to the current situation where only the welcome and introductions are closed.
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Post by castmenow on Mar 7, 2019 9:26:12 GMT
I have not been getting email notifications lately to new posts so have checked in for the first time in at least a week. It seems to be occurring on threads I have started, they hit another one some time ago. I will send a message to VB although we can manage if it does not get too bad.
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Post by castmenow on Mar 7, 2019 10:14:46 GMT
I have emailed VB suggesting members only posting and Penny has said that they will look into it.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Mar 8, 2019 9:35:03 GMT
Thanks, Castmenow. I hadn't noticed any link between spam and the original poster. At first thought, I can't see a mechanism but then we are talking about the internet so anything's possible in the wrong hands I suppose!
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